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This is the Algae Residences How may I help you, |
Autobiography
My best friend is the guitar. &I never need boyfriends.
I fall in love easily. With random things like country music, vampires,romance novels&colorful pens.
To me, Taylor Swift&The Saturdays are awesome.
I love little black dresses&scarves.
In my spare time, I like to design cards&conduct random science experiments like dipping eggs into acid.
Yeah&unlike normal humans, I like science, converging lenses&relative atomic masses included.
Secretly, I want to be a doctor& a guitarist on the spy when I grow up.
I love nonsense people who make me laugh.
&yes, I love inviting people to my house&being invited to other's houses.
I hate raindrops, airplanes, Jacob Black&jerks.
No, I'd never though that I was smart/gorgeous/talented.
I'm just a green colored pond scum.
A bitchy one to be precise.P.S My bitchiness is inherited, so beware of my mom. P.S And currently, I'm desperate for a new phone&a pair of flipflops. Indigo'09 1Hcube'08 2HighOnHiccups'09 Modern dancer |
- Friday, December 31, 2010 @ 7:01 PM 2010: kudos/sorrys/regrets/thankyous. i'm going to say them all today. (i'd congratulate you if you actually finish reading this one helluva post cause it's bloody long. don't say i never warned you) in no order of importance in my life... TAYLOR SWIFT! thankyou for being a non-stop inspiration. all that you've done eg. drying my tears when i sing songs like 'tied together with a smile' and 'brought up that way', whispering in my ear telling me that i'm not alone and forever encouraging me in love, in life, in everything in EVERY single one of your songs. you are the light in my life that made me take the first step in pursuing what i truly love and not what others want to see in me. for all the above, THANKYOU. GLEE! HAHAHAHAHAH. what the shit is this, you must be thinking. actually i also don't know. i started watching GLEE this year so here it is. saying thankyou to a television programme is really weird but whatever. thankyou for being a prime-time entertainment for me even though it distracts me from my homework, for introducing me to the two of the world's best people - dianna agron and chris colfer, and to alot of songs i never knew like livin' on a prayer, dream on and stuff. PLEASE DO A TAYLOR SWIFT EPISODE. LET ME DIE IN PEACE. AHFOONG! i didn't use a letter Y like yay! ohdamnit, i just realized 'yay' has 2 Ys in it. being my friend must be a tough call. so i really appreciate you sticking by me 99 percent of the time, swallowing down your bubbling anger whenever i'm late, racking your brains when you try to teach me math and for all the times that we fight over stupid shit like square rollercoasters. seriously, how do you stand me? i'm probably known as the world gay-est, lame-st, dumbest, blond-est piece of shit friend ever existed on the face of earth. congrats on surviving a year with me, through all the broadway, chinese drumming, cedar shi-dae OH AND SLEEPING NEXT TO ME DURING DANCE CHALET - i'm pretty surprised you woke up alive. DEAFKNEE! apologies before the thanks because i've done more harmful things that you've done awesome things, especially since our last conversation ended on a sour note. you should probably attempt to murder me. or maybe not, cause SPCA will come after you. get it? IMMA BITCH. bitch for throwing away a friendship over stupid thing, maybe you were right after all about the 'petty' part of me. bitch for being such a bitch when you didn't deserve it at all. A TRULY GENUINE HEARTFELT SORRY goes all out to you, daph. and thanks for sharing my emotional burden even though you must already feel that the entire world is pivoting on your back. and your secrets are safe with me, without a single doubt. cross your heart and prepare to die. PX! she's probably never going to read this but she's made such a significant impact on my 2010 i thought she deserves this as much as taylor swift deserved those 4 grammys. px, you would be the world's best math teacher if miss chin didn't exist! heh. thankyou for making me laugh at the world's most ridiculous stuff because science teachers are so boring, they cure my insonmia. thankyou for lending me your correction tape all the time and getting me a birthday present because that's really woah from you. thankyou for lending me your math and chinese homework too! and of course, for trying to answer my incessant questions about what the hell is miss chin talking about during amath and perpetually getting scolding from jai just because i keep on turing back to chat with you. DANISE! oh holy cow, i wouldn't know what to do if i hadn't had you, small-eyes! thankyou for constantly being there to respond to my stupid make-up talk and buzzing over new look's new collection of high heels. you've been there for me ever since sec1 and i'm praying you won't stop or else no one would go do nails with me anymore): and thank milky for me too because she's one dog that's bringing me one step closer to not being afraid of the same class of animals that jacob black come from. and your mom too because she's really nice and awesome (totally algae, what happened to your wide vocabulary) AI-TING! FROZEN LESBIAN, out of the stuff that we've done together i would have to say late-night msn convos are the ultimate best. sometimes i close the chat window totally amazed at what bizzare stuff we actually talk about. like seriously. so that's a kudos for being my midnight entertainment. and help me thank your mom because she's like the one and only person in my fan club. HAHAHAHA. and thank yourself too because you were really one great cow and principal of the LJC. KWEESTAL! i offer my most sincere apologies that i couldn't put up a pretty picture of your pretty face because we haven't taken that many nice pictures this year. but thankgod celine tan rescued me with my masterpiece that i did on some study date that i crashed. anyway, thankyou because you've got to be the most generous friend i've ever had. you've given/going to give me like the most expensive presents i've ever recieved eg. the phone that i totally lost in the confines of my own home because i'm me? and even though we're not as close as we used to be, walking around aimlessly in the sec three level bitching and me watching you hyperventilate about your cutest is nothing but a memory worth remembering. TSANG! hey you! go read one of my previous posts about how much i adored our last conversation together about you raping rollercoasters and really retarded but fun stuff. for you again, it's apologies before the flowers. i know i haven't been the nicest person on your list this year but you never returned those actions and instead you showed me what a good friend would act like. talking make-up and camwhoring turned out to be the elctrostatic bonds that held us together. chinese drumming and cedar shi-dae made us closer because you're really retarded and i respond to such people in a good way. so thankyou! and we've got another year ahead us together as classmates. SEET! another person that wouldn't be reading my blog. but here goes nothing: thankyou for playing a big role in my timetable because you are always up for impromptu study dates and macdonald lunches because you're cool like that. and apart from eating and failed studying, you're another dancer who i constantly engage you in make-up talk because people like yy and irene would never understand what i'm talking about. so, all i've got to say is a big THANKYOU and we will continue studying hard next year or rather the day before the bio paper on the phone, strive hard for top40! THE GANG! AKA the 3I kias that i'm forever hanging around with. kudos for margie, wanxin, crystal for making my recess time more awesome with the really retarded but entertaining stuff that you guys do. thankyou for letting me taste a slice of what a double science kid's life would be like and of course, entrusting your trust (?!) in me when it came to planning yy's birthday bash and thankfully, it passed with flying colors! 3M! (and miss chin) oh dang, i just realized someone rather unpleasant is in this picture): but nevermind, the spotlight's on my beloved classmates anyway. so, 3M taught me what major mugging meant in a nerd's eyes and whatever others may say about how our class is extremely mugger but we know we have fun in class singing stupid songs in chloe's iphone, making fun of px, calling haseena sabo cause we're cool, purposely going against the chen's and chia's wishes when we're in the lab cause aiqian's the world's best lab partner and disturbing peyling and yuyu (alien + monster = aster/monlian). and thankyou to the scholars for showing me the side that others would have never seen. you guys are just plain awesome and major intelligence condensed into your brain. and since miss chin is inside, let me do this like a macvalue meal. miss chin is the best teacher i've had this year and even though i totally disappointed her like hell with my fantastic D7 and many underlines on my report book for amath, she's the best math teacher cedar has and i will ever have because learning how to cope with such a dumb and partially annoying student is no easy feat. MY JUNIORS! ohdamn i must be impartial and not show any favourtism even though i'm pretty damn tempted to do so. THANKYOU THANKYOU THANKYOU, you guys deserve more because they're like so many of you. for some of you, thankyou for putting up with such a terrible senior like me. and apologies if i've been bossy or mean to anyone in particular. my bad. YOG PPL! performing in front of a thirty thousand strong crowd does not make the YOG experience as memorable as hanging out with really cool people. sitting around and being bored to tears at the F1 pit does not make me sad when i finally put 14th august behind me. it's really the people and the stuff we do that makes this whole thing a once-in-a-lifetime experience. so thankyou to the people who contributed to such a lovely memory especially my chinese drumming teacher, ian/yongqiang/jason, dancers esp. yy and celine. and i would say nigel not because i've fallen head over heels for him. it's just that i'd never thought that teaching a boy the nobody dance was expected of me when i was forced into this thing. and a slight smile always escapes my lips when i think of that. but a big smile totally shines through when i recall of performing with fireworks behind me and being dangled above the ground like grasshoppers. ME! okay, i know no one thanks themselves before they kiss their precious little statue in front of thousands watching a live telecast. but i want to thank myself because i'm glad that i didn't make rash decisions in the heat of the situtation, for not ending my life when i could, for not throwing away everything, for not building up walls to keep the closest of my friends away. 2010 has been ... ENCHANTING. (no, i'm not going to use awesome because it's so normal) -A- - @ 4:16 PM i've been toying with the idea of doing the "best of 2010" kind of series on my blog where we all break down top 10 movie quotes of the year, best break-ups, best couples, best dress on a red carpet and stuff. i was kind of keen on the idea of top 10 celebrities of the year, but then i kind of realized that my list would look like this --> . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 10. taylor swift 9. taylor swift 8. taylor swift 7. taylor swift 6. taylor swift 5. taylor swift 4. taylor swift 3. taylor swift 2. taylor swift 1. TAYLOR SWIFT? HAHAHAHAHAH okay i know i'm damn bored but inspiration's not flowing for my new year's eve post. you know big day of the year. where we can do all the shit we want, belt out all the apologies we didn't do in the past 364 days, say thankyou arigatou and xie xie even if we don't mean it because it's politically correct and scold all the bitches that have screwed your life up this 2010 and promise to take revenge by 2011 because the world's going to end soon. (seriously, just look at that. is there a single music video where taylor swift does NOT look amazingly flawless?) -A- - Thursday, December 30, 2010 @ 11:12 AM ♥♥♥♥♥ chanel iman = hot like WOAH THE VICTORIA'S SECRET FASHION SHOW JUST BLEW MY MIND AWAY. drop-dead gorgeous people, awesome music, fantastical costumes. ♥ as of now, i have 50++ taylor swift songs on my itunes on continuous replay. and i thought she was the most talented woman ever known to mankind alrd. but guess what, she actually has 78 unreleased songs. so if i do the math, she writes like 130 songs in her short career lifepsan of 9 years. and the songs are obviously BEAUTIFUL. one of my greatest life lessons i've learnt from a fictional character was to: never trust anybody with your heart. because all people do is to sacrifice someone else to save their own necks. and when you present your heart, your innermost secrets, your trust, they just run it through the paper shredding machine. and no one will stand by you through your darkest moment cause they will be so caught up in their little mindless problems. no lover, no friend, no trusted family member. and it's totally not my fault that i've learnt to be so distrusting and skeptical of the world around me. who i am now is shaped by the people around me. they taught me that betrayal is nothing but a natural instinct. backstabbing, bitchslapping are not more than just daily occurances. people sit on thrones of lies and specualation and gossipe is rife. you guys pushed me into this. don't say there ain't a warning. -A- - @ 12:02 AM yknow i think sending out white doves and putting down my mind to think really hard to come up with shoutouts for fellow friends isn't the way i blog. it just ain't me. i'm not so benevolent, kind, compassionate and caring. totally should stick to putting people down, bitching, gossiping cause that's the way we run, baby. #399 (no this is not the bullshit facebook-msg-me-a-number-and-i-will-let-you-know-what-i-think-of-you) because in the end, it all just comes down to i'm not good enough. even if it isn't, you show it. no, you simply radiate it. the way you put her before me. the way she seems to stand on your side on every single matter anyone brought up. the way you're become the exact monster that you once thought of as repulsive. the way i'd give up alot of things for you. this whole fucking thing just irks my every single nerve in my body. you put up walls and paint them all a shade a gray/ and i stood there lovin' you and wished them all away/ oh what a shame/ what a rainy ending given to a perfect day/ every smile you fake is so condescending these are the perfect lyrics i would sing to you thankyou celinetsang, today's msn conversation with you was one of the best i've had this week. no matter how much i cry, the overcast skies are not going to clear. no matter how many sad songs i blast, the lightning just won't stop hitting. no matter how much i curse, the rumbles of thunder will go on and haunt me. no matter how much i pray and hope and wish everything away, i think i should just go and study fucking chem cause i'm already so fucking stupid and if i want to pass fucking diagonstics, i better pull up my socks and dig the goddamned textbook out because i can't believe everything's slipping away like that. #968 taylor swift doesn't write emotional break-up songs because she wants the media to sit up, listen to her, and run stories for the next three weeks about her. for fuck's sake, i don't blog about emotional shit and wait for people to sympathize with me and pick me up and murmur sweet endearments to me. that's like so overrated. (my mom just won't stop nagging. my brother won't stop harassing me. my grades just won't stop plummeting. my homework will not miraculously be done. i will not turn into the world's next greatest talent. and you won't be coming back. not today, not till forever is over) -A- - Wednesday, December 29, 2010 @ 5:41 PM HAHAHAHAHAHA so whadya think of my artwork? this is what happen when you break up with taylor swift, JOE, hope you learnt your lesson. god, i need to be studying. not playing with photoshop and secretly disfiguring taylor swift's ex boyfriends. -A- - @ 12:39 PM that's my beautiful baby girl, her smile never fails to take me to another planet. ADRIAN IVASHKOV "I need you," said Lissa. "I hear that from women alot." said Adrian. ohgod, just his name is enough to melt me into a puddle of lust or something like that. YOM YA-DAH YA-DAH YA-DAH I KNOW IRENE NG & FOONG, HE'S NON-EXISTENT. but still,): okay, let's do the let's-use-as-many-adjectives thing again! by the way, i don't use the dictionary or cheat sheet or anything like that. these words are conjured by me thinking of that person. i only used the dictionary because i couldn't spell resplendent and i spelt it wrongly on my facebook status. pathetic. anyway, here it goes- Adrian Ivashkov is sinfully sexy, sensual, scintillating, tantilizing, titillating,drop-dead gorgeous, inviting, aphrodisiac, passionate, romantic, naturally charming, enticing, covetable, stimulating, indulging, scorching hot, intoxicating, lascivious, provocative, a true Adonis come to life, chivalrous, devastatingly handsome and MINE. fine, i cheated. i needed one more adjective so adrian would be a tad awesome-r than yy. i don't even know what aphrodisiac means. it doesn't even sound sexy even though its definition is a food, drink or drug that makes you want to have sex. HAHAHAHAHA. DAPHNE! since you said this makes you feel better, i'm trying my luck for a second time especially when i know you don't exactly feel like the most blessed person ever known to mankind now. well, i'm not the world's best person to offer inspirational philosophy but life is just a series of tests we all have to go through one way or another. no one gets the better end of the stick. you'd think that we have it easier than the sub-saharan africans because we have food to eat and a roof over our heads but at the same time, we have to solve simualtaneous equations and know what shit people put into blast furnaces. you'd think obama would have it easier than us because well he lives in a house that's a tourist attraction, he's a tourist attaction himself, and he's got more money that could ever fit into his pockets, but he faces the protests of millions and the pressure on him because his decisions would make or break the country. okay, that totally did not illustrate what i had in mind. i'm really terrible at this and i totally need a crash course. instead of beating round the bush, what i wanted to say is that. you're not alone. there are thousands, maybe millions out there, who have stood in the very same shoes you're in right now. they may have ran away from the problem, cried about it, or faced it headfirst, fearless. and some of them made it through and came out stronger, some of them left this fiasco scarred but what i believe is that you'll get through this anyway. and if you ever feel lost or need someone to talk to, text us. i know i'm here for you. i could have summarized everything with just three words. just stay strong. how lame can i get? YOU why do you have to so bloody annoying sometimes? like do you have to act as if you owned this world and the entire fucking human population breathe because of your existence. sometimes, i don't even know i bother to try to swallow everything back into my throat and act as if i love you to the bits and fawn over you like you're some angel. but i'm learning to be nice, learning to stop hating people. and i guess you're my common test. and damn it, i need to get an A1. i feel like i need to rewrite my autobiography AKA my little profile shit that no one reads. i know taylor swift redid hers and she could have written a biology essay about her anatomy and her the cardiac cycle in details and the would have less words than her little know-more-about-me. should i? but what i really need to learn to do is learn how to blog normally. like seriously, i'm thorougly convinced that the only people who actually read this is like yy, irene, denise, daphne. and that's because what they tag?! my tagboard looks as if it's by invitation only and dancers are like some VIP clients or what. not that it's a bad thing, sweetchicks. sometimes, i don't even know who am i blogging for these days. my posts don't even make the slightest sense. and my blogging method or technique whatever is like i just switch on my laptop and type shit because i feel like it. people type stuff like hi-i-woke-up-at-seven-am-and-had-ham-and-eggs-for-breakfast-then-i-went-to-claudia's-house-to-play-barbie or something along those lines. mine's just idk, major bitching, major swooning and sighing over my respective idols example taylor swift, adrian ivashkov, dianna agron, chris colfer... and yeah. is that boring? someone needs to let me know. but in the meantime, here's my attempt at blogging like a normal person. YAY. we had a dancer's photoshoot ystd. we met up at candy empire at 1045 then we walked to harbourfront and had lunch and tried to do homework but it was a complete failure! i ate a chicken burger (it tasted amazing) and stole yy's fries then OHGOD. I CANNOT DO THIS. I SOUND AS IF I'M WRITING TO MY DIARY WHICH IS NAMED AFTER MY CAT. what was enjoyable: the photoshoot? like duh. oh, and making mean jokes about the african people and the pope and his sex life. is that like illegal? okay, maybe i shouldn't have typed that. oh and despite what people think and tend to conjure up without even knowing me, i certainly do NOT enjoy basking in the spotlight. the photoshoot taught me this basic fact about myself the hard way. camera flashes gave me a throbbing headache. smiling non-stop for three hours straight is going to give me premature wrinkle. fighting for the better spot on the camera does not do that for me either. i think i'm just going to stick to my camwhoring. if being a superstar is that much of a tremendous pain, how the hell does taylor swift do it? maybe stars can do it because they're prettyyyyyyy. and i'm not. like as if no one knew that. bloodyhell, this post is so damn long. and i have alot to say idk why): maybe another post at night. another chance to post a taylor swift, so why not? (: -A- - Monday, December 27, 2010 @ 12:47 PM DAPH! this is for you. now you don't need to download the taylor swift font to view it. so, is it as curvy and glamorous as you'd expected? I guess it's true that love was all you wanted Cause you're giving it away like it's extra change Hoping it will end up in his pocket But he leaves you out like a penny in the rain Hold on, baby, you're losing it The water's high, you're jumping into it And letting go... and no one knows That you cry, but you don't tell anyone That you might not be the golden one And you're tied together with a smile But you're coming undone ; if you forwarded me a text last night, then you're probably this little paragraph's audience. yknow, before we had the confessions-of-a-loveaholic talk in the train station, i'd never expected that you bottled up so much stuff in you. bloody hell, i'm taking such a long time to think what i want to say you. i guess i'm really terrible at words. i should probably write you a song or something, maybe i'll have an easier time with that and hence the quote quote from taylor swift. but anyway, don't let what she says interfere with who you want to see when you look into the mirror. don't let her words shape what's really inside you. it's not your fault that she cannot reciprocate the friendship you're offering her. plus, no one placed an age restriction on friends and even though i may not be holding up a banner and starting up a rally to support your 'lifestyle choices', but if it makes you happy, why not? and no one places their real self on facebook. it's just a stupid social network that zuckerberg earns millions from where people put their fake ages, fake school, fake martial status there. no big deal, sweetheart. (and i hope that i picked the correct song lyrics because i'm really having a hard time trying to 'read' people) i'm going to go with irene's defintion of holiday homework. which translates to CHINESE HOMEWORK IS NOT HOMEWORK. and that means i've finished my entire set of holiday homework except for half of amath cause i'm a stupid bitch like that and yy's going to have a hard time attempting to be my math tutor on tuesday morning. 've been watching alot of videos on youtube. (godamnit, boxing day should be renamed as boring day) yy says that watching dance video inspires her, make her want to wake up each morning ready to be a better dance, somewhere along those lines. but how come it doesn't work that way for me? i'm not exactly or anywhere near being a music prodigy but at fifteen, i'm willing to learn. i forsee myself fifteen years down the road asking my friends who are married and with child to recommend a good music school and they would say that i don't have kids (like duh) and i would say 'it's never too late to stop learning'. i want to pick up the piano - my lifelong dream -, i want to learn to play the violin, i want to buy myself a drum kit, i want... there's just so many things i want to do. but sometimes seeing those damn talented people make me think, can i be even one-ninth as good as them? (this christmas, i thought my mom would finally pick up the hints after my usual plastering-my-face-against-the-glass-of-a-music-instrument-store and that she would buy me a keyboard as a gift. nah da da da, i got a pint of ben&jerry's ice cream. how practical, mom) OH AND YOU GUYS THOUGHT THAT I WAS A HARCORE TAYLOR SWIFT FAN?! well then you haven't seen half of the world. -A- - Saturday, December 25, 2010 @ 5:05 PM and i totally forgot to mention, SHE (aka irene ng) thinks that "ITALY IS PART OF FRANCE RIGHT?!!!!!' oh for the love of god, -A- - @ 4:43 PM FROZEN LESBIANNNNNNN!!! IRENE NG AI TING, WHY ARE WE SO GAY?! CAUTIONZZZZZ EVERYONE CAUTION! YOU ARE HIGHLY RECOMMENDED NOT TO SPEAK TO IRENE NG ON MSN OR EVEN ATTEMPT TO VIDEO CALL HER BECAUSE SHE WILL MAKE SURE THAT YOUR KEYBOARD IS ON PERMANENT CAPS LOCK ON AND YOU WILL MOST PROBABLY GET A HEART ATTACK IN THE MIDST OF THIS PROCESS BECAUSE SHE ACTS AS IF SHE'S A MODEL FOR SILKPRO SHAMPOO. FURTHERMORE, WEBCAMING HER IS ALMOST PORN-LIKE BECAUSE YOUR CONVERSATION WILL CONSIST OF WORDS LIKE BOOBS AND TELL YOU STORIES ABOUT HER BOLSTERS WHICH ARE 8YEARS OLD. SHIT. i mean, shit. i just typed the entire paragraph in caps. irene.ng.is.a.bad.influence. WELCOME BACK YY! surviving the past week without spamming your inbox has proved to be one of life's toughest challenges!!!!! thankgod for your early arrival(((((((((((((: oh and, MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE! (: -A- - Friday, December 24, 2010 @ 1:52 PM after you've read this post and last night's one, you'll probably be thinking that i'm either bipolar or suffering from depression. or if you're that cynical, you'll think i'm just an attention whore. "I loved you!" he yelled. He jumped up out of his chair so quickly I never saw it coming. "I loved you, and you destroyed me. You took my heart and ripped it up. You might as well have staked me!" The change in his features also caught me by surprise. His voice filled the room. So much grief, so much anger. So unlike the usual Adrian. He strode toward me, hand clasped over his chest. "I. Loved. You. And you used me the whole time." i bawled/moaned/mourned/sobbed/broke down after i read this paragraph. how selfish some people can be. they live and thrive in their newly-found happy ending, oblivious to the pain they have caused to the people around them. people who loved them become pawns to help them get to their final destination, people who become victims in exchange for the greater good and after that we all just fade into the back of their minds. yeah i know i'm thinking too much into a fictional story that would never come to life because there are vampires and half-vampires and royal vampires etc. but i think it's kind of a known fact that i'm a sucker for romance stuff, your typical romeo and juilet shit gives me crying fits. it's not my fault that i'm so obsessed with matters of the heart. it's not my fault that i'm always the third party that threatens the equilibrium of your love equation. it's not my fault that i'm the one who's always getting hurt. and it's not my fault that you're just that heartless. (plus delving into the profound secrets and depths of love pales in comparison with problems brought about by mathematicians who have nothing to do their sad lives) by the way, GO.READ.VAMPIRE.ACADEMY. it's an awesome book. something like a cross-breed between harry potter and twilight. loved the last book but hated the ending. couldn't richelle mead given a happy ending not at the expense of other people's feelings. DAMN HER. iloveyou, adrian ivashkov. (another reason why i'll never have a shot at love because all the people that i fall for are FEMALE country singers, FEMALE spelling bees on glee, guys who are only interested in getting into the pants of someone of the SAME SEX and FICTIONAL vampires who don't exist) -A- - Thursday, December 23, 2010 @ 10:51 PM my mother's spring cleaning now. and i thought people only did that before chinese new year. but whatever, she says she wants to throw me out of the house along with all the fucking rubbish she found. and with the combined stress of not being able to do my amath holiday homework cause i'm a fucking retard like that and i don't derserve a shot at life, here's what i have to say. i don't know why denise proudly proclaimed that her dear friend here is like the most courageous lion she has ever seen in her entire life. i'm sorry to disappoint you, big-eyes, i'm a fucking coward. no actually i'm worse than that because they say that people who commit suicide are cowards because they don't stand up to problems and all that fucking holy and saint and you give advice to people but you dont follow them anyway. well guess what i'm even worse than that fucking coward. cause i don't even dare to take my own life. take it into my own bloodied hands. too scared to take that pink pill that will mark the turning point on the graph. too scared to jump out of the ninth storey window even though i'm standing on the stool already. too scared to press the penknife harder against my arteries. it does not help either when she looks at me as if i'm the sole reason now why my uncle has cancer. why he's dead. why my grandfather is almost deaf. why korea peninsula is starting a war. why western europe is in deep fucking debt. the way her eyes bore into mine seems to tell me a story that i was a born a plaque and i will die a fucking black and troublesome plaque. i miss you, D, i really do. i'm so fucking tempted to kill myself now to join you. but i don't want to disappoint you, i want to be strong. just like you. and i would love to have someone to talk to now. an outlet to run this anger. but all anyone does is to ask if i'm okay and i reply the politically correct answer, yeah sure, fit as a fiddle, dudette. i'm sorry i'm sounding like a typical whiny and spoilt teenager. beneath the why-the-fuck-am-i-so-hideous, are-these-thunder-thighs-mine, i-cant-do-a-fucking-front-split, and all the stress from not being able to do four plus three equals to seven, i'm already broken. and i thought having friends, indulging myself in astrophysics and organic chemistry, making music would heal these scars. but fucking math questions and my mom just make them resurface. all fucking over again. -A- - Wednesday, December 22, 2010 @ 3:11 PM :( WALAU. THE LAST BOOK OF VAMPIRE ACADEMY WAS OUT ON THE 7TH DECEMBER AND I'M SUCHA PIECE OF LAG AND FAIL SHIT, THE 22ND THEN REALIZE. AND SOME INTELLECTUALLY CHALLENGED PART OF MY BRAIN WENT TO READ THE ENTIRE PLOT ON WIKIEPEDIA AND I'M DAMN ANGRY WITH RICHELLE MEAD NOW. WHAT KIND OF ENDING WAS THAT?! TOTALLY UNFAIR FOR MY BELOVED ADRIAN IVASHKOV. IT'S OKAY SWEETCHICKS, YOU KNOW YOU STILL HAVE ME. imma so pissed, the mood for doing chinese homework totally sublimated. HEES-TOH-REE'S REPEATING ITSELF. three years ago after i got my PSLE results my mom filled in my secondary-school-posting-option-form-whatever-just-that-piece-of-paper-with-6-blanks-that-determines-your-future without taking into consideration of her daughter's personal choice. yeah so cedar, here i am now. and now, it's my brother's turn at this stupid game where my mom thinks its a video game and she gets to manipulate poor little kids like us into making 'right' life choices and rack up points on the sidebar but all she does is just to fuck everything up. santa, this year, can you please take the lift to my house because HDB flats don't have chimneys and knock some sense into my mur-thur please? try to convince her/let her see the light that my brother's not going to be that smart kid that she wants all her children to be. that my brother has a learning disability and she should be damn well proud he actually did reasonably well. that my brother has no interest in joining whatever awesome CCA you claim that will be beneficial for his mental health because all i know is that he likes to play chess and swim and not join band or the student council. and THIS IS my brother's future, not hers. and she screwing up twenty years ago does not justify why she should make my brother's life so miserable. last night i blogged about how i was partially jealous that most of my primary school friends are leading way better lives that me. about how they have boyfriends, how they look stunning, how they get to perform in front of thousands, how they are all so smart and bloody hell i want to jump off a cliff. but then again, the very one thing i have and they don't are my awesome friends. (welcome goosebumps, this is downright cheesy) none of my friends will ever find a yy that is so ridiculously perfect in almost anyway possible and yet she's probably unaware of that. or a irene that is so pox-ed up and hilarious and types in caps most of the time and bullshit and porny. or a daphne that is ... well, i can't find an adjective... so lovable, vunerable yet strong, both at the same time. or a krystal that is so bullshit but secretly smart underneath and so complex and an awesome listening ear when you needed one. or a denise that has eyes as small as my denise fung! HAHAHAHA. or a laura that is so sensetive and has to take so much of my crap and still hangs on. or a math genius like PX who refuses go out of her front door unless there's a war/bomb and she needs to escape. or a yuyu that is as smart. HAHAHAH. seriously, how can anyone be that un-intellectually challenged, so talented and linguistically developed?! now i totally sound as if this is happy friendship day or some let's-start-a-chain-message-to-thnak-people. ohgod, what happened to being a bitch. the previous paragraph's so sweet i need to go brush my teeth. I.SWEAR.MATHEMATICIANS.CREATED.ALL.THIS.SHIT.TO.TORTURE.TEENAGERS. after my partially inspring speech that probably did not make anyone feel like taking out their amath textbook and start eagerly reading about the pascal's triangle, EEUGHHHH is the definition of math. spent the entire afternoon industriously trying to make friends with trigo and surds but these guys are stubborn bastards. they just refuse to make life easier for me. thankgod i am going out with math genuises tomorrow. amen. oh my day is so interesting i just rewatched the entire glee season2 in the last couple of days. and did SS. and attempted chinese. and got slaughtered in the math abbattoir where they slash kids and make them into mince meat. ohgod, my life is so interesting i should probably write a book about it and sell it at 40bucks per page at borders or something and become a millionaire. any takers for being my publisher? -A- - Tuesday, December 21, 2010 @ 10:23 PM I'M HUNGRY. it's also for daphne who THANKGOD-FULLY is coming home tomorrow! so TEACHERS, i AM making an effort. no i'm not a complacent little bitch who refuses to do her homework (well, i am but that's not the point) I AM TRYING TO PASS MY DIAGNOSTIC TESTS but logarithms and linerar laws are really boring, i'm sincerey apologetic.
I've decided September will be National Sue Sylvester Month.... I only eat mermaid-safe tuna. Did you know that thousands of mermaids get raped in tuna nets each year? OHGOD. stalking fictional glee characters on glee may just be funnest thing i've done today. speaking of things that i've accomplished, i think i'm pretty proud to say that i'm a darn failure. i was going through my friend's albums on facebook AKA stalking other people just cause i don't want to complete my homework and i realized IMMA SUCHA FAILURE. -A- - Saturday, December 18, 2010 @ 9:30 PM YAYYYYY! HAHAHAHAHAHAH. any resemblance? exhibit B (YINGYI, WHAT ARE YOU?! A FACE-CHANGING EXPERT?!) OHYEAHMANZ. run devil run was one of the funnest performances i've ever done (between dancing in 4inch heels and acting as if your dog just died for SYF, which one would you pick?) and there were many firsts for all us too. nat's first onstage performance. yy's, rachel's, daphne's first experience with heels. nat's first brush with nail polish. everyone's first time dancing and partying in heels. and probably the first time the school hall has seen a PROPER kpop performance (no, mr teo's sorry-sorry-sorry-what-the-heck-are-you-dancing did not work out) and despite the fact that half of us were last-minute-drop-ins, irene got poxed by the chicken, we only had 3 practices, for every minute we practiced there were 2 minutes where eunice and rachel and cherie and nat were dancing to random kpop songs like nu abo and etc. and some sec4s weren't exactly the most appreciative lot i've ever seen, it was AWESOME. (someone needs to inject life into my vocabulary. awesome is a word that's bloody overused) having nat on the team is DOWNRIGHT HILARIOUS. our dear leader aka taeyon is forever bouncy, adorable and i'm forever making fun of using a straightener on her eyebrows and how she should donate some to yy's sparse population of eyebrows is further proof that no one needs to be a dancer to be able to dance. and screw the emcee's THANK YOU THE CEDAR MODERN DANCERS and for god's sake, it's cedar shi-dae. and plus, talking to nat on the way home kind of enlightened me on some stuff. her impression of being in the cool dancers club for a week and half is 'how come dancers are forever hungry and they eat so much macs and yet never gain an ounce' and she taught me how to see someone in a brand new light. one for the most adorable taeyon ever known to mankind, two for the jessica who invented the QIAN BIAN dance and fights with me over our ending pose, three for the sunny who has convinced herself she's the most hideous and monsterous person on earth and compliment is not a word in her dictionary (and happens to be one hell of a beauty), four for the yoona who's supposed to be tall and REALLY pretty, five for the sooyoung who's REALLY REALLY tall, six for the hyoyeon who cannot pull off a slut face but looks ridiculously pretty anyway, seven for the yuri who keeps on making mistakes but pulled off the dance beautifully in the end, eight for the seohyun who is hilarious with a capital H, nine for probably the most failed imitation/rendetion of tiffany ever, ten, for the fact that we are COOL KIDS. (to find out who's who, look at my facebook album, cedar shi-dae! we got our promotion close-up and portrait shots) prom was how do you put it.... eye-opening? seeing mz in a dress was shocking - and of course i had to report to my dear vanessa who just came back from korea. seeing how some of the sec4s pulled off a fun and flirty prom as a i'm-a-slut-where-do-i-take-a-bus-to-the-red-light-district reminded not to flash my boobs or something next year. seeing how pathetic our school events were organized make me ponder and ask myself why the heck did i join cedar. next year, my friends from other schools would be in five star hotel ballrooms waltzing with their hands on a boy's shoulders while i'll be sitting in front of a table of teachers who look as if they had been paid to attend the event and hence they looked bored like nobody's shit. but who cares, the day i use the word 'fun' to describe cedar is the day my body is lowered into a bloody wooden coffin or i'm rolled into the cremation thingy place something. point taken. and thus next year after-parties are a must, no one's going to count on cedar to make prom awesome shitz, we just have to take this grave matter into our hands. and i really want to celebrate with the dancers): yy, daphne, denise, irene. our last time to dress together. being a sec4 sucks. everything rhymes with 'last' first and last and only shot at Os. last SYF. last prom. last day. last whatever shit. last waltzing that twenty minutes walk to cedar that usually have us sweating cause the government does not know how to create a bus service or plant more trees. and bloody hell, there's like 2weeks till school starts. fuck, i thought chinese Os just ended and i was walking out of school compound with margie and gang and having lunch and naming each other after elements and planning yy's birthday bash on the spy. how the hell did time fly past like a rocket? or light, since it's the fastest thing on earth. and the greatest thing of all: majority of us haven't finishing the goddamned fucking homework. oh and something even better, my dear dear dancers (this totally shows that i have no life apart from dance) are all up up and away, throwing themselves onto planes and taking the next flight out of this little red dot called singapore and not returning till christmas. -A- - Tuesday, December 14, 2010 @ 9:22 PM one of the 5392716103 reasons why i love glee. HEH. today was mad awesome fun. danced run devil run in heels and were stared by a thousand different cedarians. don't know if we should take that as compliments or imagine that they were thinking 'OMGGGG.THOSE PEOPLE ARE PHYSCHOS' and after dance was crazy arcade shit where we the citizens of cedar land managed to sneak in with our run devil run costumes and spent like 10bucks on games. stuff i realized: eunice is awesome at probably every single thing ever known to mankind. she can play drum hero LIKE WTF BETTER THAN DAPHNE. she knows like three thousand different kpop dances. SHE ANSWERS THE PHYSICS QUESTIONS THAT DAPHNE CAN'T ANSWER. and i can't play drums for nuts. urban drum crew must have totally misjudged my non-existent talent. ohgod, i'm watching the stupid channel eight nine oclock show. and i'm rolling my eyes non-stop. jeannette aw (however you spell her name) is an utter failed hooker. if she were a prostitute or stripper, she'd be bankrupt and jobless. and the show is just plain dumb. -A- - Monday, December 13, 2010 @ 9:42 PM HAPPY BIRTHDAY DARLING SWIFT! i feel as if i betrayed you just because i blasted glee songs on your special day. i wanted to do like some look-at-taylor-swift-grow from 2005 to 2010 and show the world that she's not a plastic korean star or some fucked up american rapper or whatever. but i got a little tired choosing the pictures): sometimes it sucks when she's so photogenic. you feel like uploading 32923432 photos but blogger will probably hang my ass. i hate to begin on such a vulgar note but FUCK MY MOM YO. apparently, she has this belief that torturing the hell out of me is the only way to attain nirvana. like are you freakin' serious. she thinks that every single time i step out of the iron wrought gates, i am going to take my little leather mini short skirt (for the love of god, i don't even own one) and give some man a lap dance or a standing up strip show or a blowjob against the sink. for crying out loud, how do i seduce when i'm a pathetic little rabbit-like innocent creature without a fucking phone because someone believes that whatever you hand me will just magically disappear. putting the bitch aside, i actually have quite an eventful week ahead. of course, apart from the fact that today's taylor swift's birthday and she probably spend 13th december in a multi-million dollar, star-studded party in LA or something while yours sincerely just blasted glee songs to drown out my mother's incessant nagging about me not finishing homework, about me buying two pairs of heels in a month, about me wearing so much eyeliner, about me and my not so demure looking nails, and me and my lack of housework done and me a fucking thousand different things she can find fault with me about. on the greener side of the pasture, tomorrow's tuesday! i have dance. and we're dancing in heels. how fun. but sadly, miss i-have-a-boob-blister AKA horny irene won't be there, thus equating to less fun): get well soon sweetchicks! and wednesday, i have a supposedly proper study date cause i'm going out with the smart kids to study. deep down, i'm praying that it will be productive. and on thursday, i'm going to get my nails done again and throng the streets of orchard with denise and yy and daphne (hopefully). and on friday, PROM NIGHT! and that's supposed to sound like a really fun week condensed into hundred and forty words. CHINESE COMPREHENSIONS > ENGLISH COMPREHENSIONS and yes, this is despite the fact that i cannot read the first word of my chinese homework's cloze passage - which is an obvious omen that i should not do it - but ENGLISH COMPREHENSIONS AND SUMMARIES SUCK BIG TIME. LIKE WHY THE HELL DO WE NEED TO KNOW ABOUT COMMUNERISM?! yeah, i'm flaring up over two pathetic and harmless looking pieces of paper AKA torturous homework. i really hate english comprehensions and summaries. they have this sickened need to throw in bombastic words and trick us into looking up in the dictionary when you could have just replaced with a four letter word. oh here's a four-letter one for you. FUCK. words like antiestablishment (which doesn't even exist in the dictionary the last time i checked longman), satirical, transmogrified... and list goes on. like seriously. and unlike cool shit chinese comprehension passages that i actualy enjoy reading, english has to drone on and on about how america's once-bullish economy is on the verge of collasping, how china is plagued by social and environmental problems and something abotu frickin' patagonia dessert - like where the fuck is that. ohgod, i really hate holiday homework. and i'm barely halfway through. so much for an ambitious goal of finishing it before this friday. Everybody loves a winner So nobody loved me Lady peaceful, lady happy That's all I want to be All of the odds are They're in my favour Something's bound to begin i cried watching the latest epsiode of glee. like oh hoo-fucking-ray. to my little brother who's being a bloody bastard; you got two hundred and twenty nine. out of three hundred. for a national exam. not some stupid spelling your balding teacher gives you in school. and i got thirty marks higher than you. and no, you don't have the fucking right to say in my face that i failed amath because you step into your new secondary school and realize how hard is proving trigo functions and log and surds, don't say anything in my face. you're pissing me off. and pretty much everything is pissing me off tonight. DAPHNE! thursday! imma watching you. -A- - Thursday, December 9, 2010 @ 9:14 PM It's a beautiful night, We're looking for something dumb to do Hey baby, I think I wanna marry you Is it the look in your eyes, Or is it this dancing juice? Who cares baby, I think I wanna marry you DENISE&FOONGYY! despite the fact that irene and daphne cancelled on us and we spent alot of cash today and i didn't get my pair of desired heels and we were the probably the noobest people that stepped into a nail salon because we camwhore with OPI nail polish and we danced run devil run in shoe stores and we look terribly unglam most of the time and we complain like shit when we wear heels and YINGYI IS LIKE THE PRETTIEST AMONG THE THREE OF US AND YET SHE KEEP ON SAYING 'NOOOO IMMA HIDEOUS MONSTER', TODAY.WAS.AWESOME. we should totally do this more often. (and denise, for the first time in your life, you have BIG EYES! HAHAHAHAHA) YAY YAY YAY YAY YAY I TOTALLY CANNOT WAIT FOR PROM. HAHAHA right algae, and you're not even the sec4 whose 17th december is going to the night of nights, you're just performing you stupid dumb blonde. but whatever, OUR BELOVED AH FOONG IS GOING TO WEAR HEELS AND DANCE FOR YOU MANZ. and i'm going to have a chance to curl her hair! and play with makeup! and attempt to look like tiffany from snsd with the 'super playboy' sign. and for the second time in my life, i can dress in the tightest of dresses, have heavy thick goth girl like eyeliner and act like a slut/whore AND NO ONE CARES! someone needs to constantly remind me about a few stuff, 1. I NEED TO LEARN HOW TO BE FEMININE AND DEMURE or else my newly manicured nails will break and i will cry 2. how the stupid bloody holidays are ending and i need to start finishing my homework, damn 3. and start mugging cause we're all stupid in our teachers' eyes 4. algae, please stop spending moneyyyy! 5. stop talking to irene on msn or else i'll be cinderella, always sleeping after 12 6. stop mouthing 'fuck' at my mom but sometimes i really cannot help it because she's such a fuckingggg bitch like what the fuck is wrong with going for a fucking manicure and buying a fucking dress with my own fucking money i'm not your fucking prisoner. even mas selamat had more privacy than me. fuckkkk. irene; NOOOOO. CHANGE ALRD. YOU'RE FROM PLUTO! HAHAHAHAH. daphne; make it up to me. ask me out on a date. let me peer counsel you. let's eat macarons. yy; YAY. mission accomplished! you've officially completed the first commandment of feminism - to own a pair of heels! i feel so proud of you(: -A- - Tuesday, December 7, 2010 @ 3:06 PM oh goshhh, for crying out loud, I LOVE GLEE. i'd like to think that my holidays have progressed in a certain direction. long were the days when i was chugging chocolate milk as if mad cow disease was going to wipe out the entire population of cattle tomorrow while watching gleeeeeeee illegally online and thinking about how terrible SYF is going to turn out. now i'm drinking green tea like i'm krystal lim number two and dying, whimpering, whining, moaning till the next episode of glee comes out, attempting biology homework on occasional occasions and planning dates that never work out because some tell me that they have to hospitals, some tell me they're going korea, USA, eastern europe, the moon, i don't know. AND I'M GOING TO HELL, BABY. bascially, my whole point is: the holidays suck balls. in another 6days, taylor swift's going to turn 21! YAY. why the shit am i so happy about? damn, she's one year closer to stepping into the graveyard. *whimpers* oh, and exactly a week ago from today, there was this worldwide-celebration-lets-raise-awareness world AIDS day that i think hardly anyone knew about (my mom didn't, i didn't) and let's see what the whole point of the festival? to celebrate that two million people die from that 'terrible disease that has manifested itself on mankind' and that despite the fact that billions of taxpayer's greenback are spent and THERE IS STILL NO CURE FOR AIDS. YAYYY, let's cheer man, where's the confetti? i don't say this everyday but, BIO IS A PUBLIC NUISANCE. PHYSICS DOES NOT MAKE A SINGLE SPECK OF SENSE. CHEMISTRY OH MY DEAR CHEMISTRY, STOP BEING A PAIN IN THE ASS! ): in such terrible circumstances, there's only a single movie that can cheer up me. this totally explains why 'the devil wears prada' is constantly on replay. i've watched it like what, four times this week? and it's only tuesday. GET ME A LIFE, SOMEONE. i have $12.70 to last me for the rest of my holidays. and i bet that's like less than what those malnourished little black kids from kenya survive on. fuckkkk, mom, i need cash. -A- - Saturday, December 4, 2010 @ 12:01 AM Once upon a time I was falling in love But now I'm only falling apart There's nothing I can do A total eclipse of the heart And I need you now tonight And I need you more than ever And if you'll only hold me tight We'll be holding on forever And we'll only be making it right Cause we'll never be wrong together We can take it to the end of the line Your love is like a shadow on me all of the time defying gravity and total eclipse of the heart is on constant playback on my itunes, even i don't know why. maybe i just need sombre songs to keep up with the i'm-an-adolescent-relationship-problems-are-bigger-than-your-stupid-world-peace-plans kind of thing. 1. i don't know why i have the urge to blog in bullets. maybe because my life is already so messed up, i need to start taking up the smallest chances to reorganize things. 2. if we were to play a game of whose-life-sucks-balls-the-most, who would win? casting people from war-torn somalia aside, of course. standing here watching the person you love most give all of their love to someone else and you're like cellophane to them, your affection goes unnoticed while their little someone means the world to them like they were to you. or, confessing your love but they never give it back. or, being restrained from telling people who you like because they'll judge you because of it. 3. second prize. the back-up plan. the net who will always be there to catch you whenever you're free-falling but you never give it damn when you're happy and strolling about. i'm biting my knuckles now because i don't know what to type. i want to pour my heartfelt feelings (yes and despite contary belief, my heart is not just a muscle. i am in touch with my innermost feelings. thankyou) out but i can't. why? remember image? if i drain myself of all the shit i'm bottling right inside now, i'll probably sound like a whiny ill cat and plus, names can't be mentioned for confidentiality reasons. they don't call it 'secrets' for nothing. 4. How do you conjugate the verb to love? another quote from glee, if you were wondering. there's a few versions of the definitions of homosexuality wikiepdia (my best friend) offers. i think i'll stick to the being sexually attracted to the same gender one. if so, then why the hell do people throw around the word 'lesbian' in our school so often? i like taylor swift does not mean anything. i find half of the ladies on glee especially dianna agron extremely hot does not mean anything. even me kissing girls does not mean anything. so why is the mentality of lesbian-ism driven so hard into everyone's head? in my case, i've just given up on boys altogether. can't afford another setback. and plus, even if hypothetically, a girl likes a girl, it does not mean anything either. liking, loving, dating does not mean sex is on the other side of the balanced equation. so i think it's time for people to take some time to iron out their thinkings. 5. it's kind of a ritual. everytime i want to blog about something really whiny and teenager-like, i have to put up a disclaimer. it's a no-please-do-not-think-that-i'm-an-airhead-who-spends-her-afternoons-counting-her-facebook-friends-because-i-read-books-on-global-oil-crisis-and-certainly-do-not-think-that-salmons-come-in-orange-rectangles yeah. so there again, you have it. ; i'm sorry i'm a terrible confidant, counseller and friend altogether. i think you were a better listening ear when i told you about it back in the train station, remember? i send out my texts to you thinking that the concern would make a little dent on the misery you're feeling. i draft out encouraging blogposts but delete them cause i'll never have the optimistic kind of impact on people. and i'm learning to accept that fact. hence, i once again extend my most sincere apologies for being less than A1 good friend. if i'm even one. -A- - Friday, December 3, 2010 @ 5:11 PM HAHAHHAHAHAYAY! I.LOVE.THIS.GIRL. ((((((((((: move over grey's, move over upper east side, move over vampy diaries, GLEE'S HERE TO STAY. 1. ystd was the official last dance practice of the week, of the month, of the year. like YESSSS BABYYY, let's kiss why-the-hell-didnt-miss-chua-open-the-studio, muscle aches, bruises, constant reminders that you suckkkk from your teacher GOODBYE. at least for now. but i'll be missing 'imma lesbian, i love myself' AKA moon dancer AKA irene. missing peeps like deafknee, YY AH, daaaanise, yx, seet, and juniors. well, you can't have your cake and eat it. 2. went for my older bro's wedding on tuesday. it's was not a wagner's traditional wedding march den den den den and then they walk down the aisle, they exchange rings, say i do i do i do yeah man i do, and then wedding feast! blah, it was boring like shit. apparently, my considerate brother conveniently forgot that his little sister would break out in hives/smallpox/cowpox-like rashes when exposed to seafood of the world, thus i spent half the time texting laura and the other half asking my younger brother 'who the shit is that lao kok kok there?' cause we hardly knew anyone that was invited to the wedding. so you ask me, was it fun? 3. my homework pile is so stagnant mosquitoes larvaes can breed inside there. study dates, anyone? 4. this is the reason why you should not have kids. my unwed OTHER brother just invited a bunch of kids to my house. and god, THIS REDEFINES HELL. 'what's your name?' 'how old are you?' 'what shcool are you in?' 'what is your last name?' OHMYGOD, GET A LIFE. and then while i was watching glee, 'WHO'S THE GUY?! HAHAHAHA. HE HAS A FUNNY HAIRSTYLE' mohawk, girl, mohawk. and then she starts to throw a tantrum when her cousins play a prank on her. 'I'LL TELL MY MOTHER ABOUT YOUUUU' right, and i'll tell the president. hence, children is not an addition to your loving family aka propoganda to increase birth rate, it's waste of money, time, effort, increases our already high enough carbon emissions because diapers and milk powder don't fall from the sky and it contributes to air pollution, water pollution, most importantly, NOISE pollution. and don't say 'you were once a kid' in protest. i didn't choose to be born. 5. my mother has a tendency to give me a knowing look when we watch shows about teenage pregnancy, syphilis and my-boyfriend-dumped-me-after-bad-oral-sex. she condemns my interaction with anyone without ovaries. i have to change guy names on my msn to sarah and jane and cheryl for fear she impersonates me and throw my face in front of my already small enough social circle. so mah-ther, I'M NOT GETTING A BOYFRIEND IN THE NEAR FUTURE. or the far future. so please worry more about me turning homosexual then me being hetrosexual and horny with someone with balls. cause if you haven't realized, the only non-female i like on this earth is CHRIS COLFER. and he's gay. not happy gay. it's i-want-to-be-in-bed-with-another-man kind of gay. so there's no need to book an appointment with planned parenthood or place a reservation for medicine that cures gential warts any time soon. thankyou. 6. out of sheer curiousity of who actually read this blog, i decided to click some 'stats' hyperlink on blogger.com i'm not batting an eyelid that most of my readers come from we-live-in-tiny-singapore. but what amazes me is that, russia comes in second. fifteen people from the largest country in the world clicked on an-alternate-paradise this week. woah is the word to describe everything running through my head. 7. my brother's friend misread my cedar dancer shirt as 'cedar cancer'. i LOL-ed for five minutes straight in macdonalds. 8. as if i don't need a reminder, i know i am a close to worthless, just another fiftten year old human breathing on this world. another mouth mother earth needs to feed. but i'm really praying this time - not because i have selfish needs such as i don't want my kpop idol to die - please do not start a world war three. not that mr. north korea or mr. south korea is reading my blog (no koreans on the stats apparently), but don't. i've never gone through a war, and i intend to make it through to my coffin without seeing a huge major i'm-going-to-plant-nuclear-bombs-and-blow-up-asians kind of thing. war is just a stupid chess game where ordinary people like us are the chess pieces. smaller, worthless people are the pawns. the higher the value gets, you get promoted. a bishop, a knight (not horse people). and chess games always end with less pieces you start with. people die, families get broken, dreams get smashed like glass against a concrete wall. and sure, i like to play chess. but i don't like being played in a chess game. and no, i'm not writing a paper trying to be some mediator or aiming to win noble prize for breaking up tensions. i'm just trying to speak up. a little voice no one's going to hear. not now, not ever. 9. i'm thinking if it is a compliment or insult when you're not legal to have sex or watch NC16 movies but you get approached by hard to shake off sellers who try to promote insurance and credit cards to you and you're offered alcohol at weddings. does making you feel old feel good? 10. the reason why i'm madly in love with taylor swift and is full of awe for dianna agron is not because they're blond (partly but still), or that they have incredibly beautiful eyes or flawless-ness that make angels cry. so if you're thinking that you increase your stats by coming up with a blueprint on how to be prettier, you're more wrong than when brittany said that the square root of four is rainbows. anyone who like anyone else just because they have nice eyes is as skin-deep as you are. and what's worse is that YOU'RE NOT EVEN THAT PRETTY SO WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU POLLUTING MY FACEBOOK HOME PAGE. 11. anyone can sing, they're singers. anyone can dance, they're dancers. anyone can love, but does that make them lovers? ; i've been thinking. like late-night-toss-and-turn-on-my-bed kind of thinking. i was more than a mean bitch. i was cynical. i was critical. i was selfish. i was inconsiderate. i was a two-faced whore. and the friendship that you're offering me now is the worst form of punishment you could ever offer me. and i'm trying to make amendment, trying to fill in the cracks when i broke everything. but it can never be enough, can it? -A- |
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» http://onlyforblonds.tumblr.com/i blew it up for y...» OMFGI FLIPPED. (NOT LITERALLY)I JUMPED OFF MY SEAT... » LET ME GUESS...THIS is extremely ugly. THIS WOMAN ... » HE'S SO FUCKING HOT WITH A CAPITAL H.OH CHRIS COL... » this was like what, two years ago? thank god we've... » FOR SUCKER FOONG,since i'll never get quinn and yo... » i forgot to mention that it's only the 6th day of ... » it's not my fault but making fun of bieber is wher... » what could be a better way to start the new year t... » 2010: kudos/sorrys/regrets/thankyous. i'm going to... |
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